Last year, it seemed a little trivial to just do a #ootd, look at what they are wearing post without explaining a little about the inspiration behind it, so I thought I’d carry on with the new tradition.
With international women’s day looming (8th March), I wanted to start the celebrations a little early as I like to think of it as a day to bring the cause to the forefront and bring awareness. It is a celebration of women, yes, but it is also so much more important than that.
So important I don’t know where to begin.
So maybe I start with the lil dinks and why it’s important for them.
Generations of women before us fought for women’s rights. In my own cultures, historically there have been: The [Igbo] Women’s War in Nigeria, and in Britain the suffragette movement. Both of them are inspiring, and show the strength and determination of a woman. Although things have improved in some spaces (and there are still improvements to be made), there are other spaces where to be a woman is still considered to mean you have lower ability or even to be of an inferior class.
It is now our turn, both men and women, to do our bit to stop the unfairness of the current system. Except many other women (and men) including me are taking a two-pronged approach to the cause. By not only protesting to the powers that be, but by teaching their children the value of the female…
ALL of their children. The boys as well as girls.
These are the individuals that are teaching both their boys and girls to respect themselves and each other, to see each other as equals and not to follow a system which has in so many ways been oppressive.
Feminism is something every man, woman and child needs, for so many reasons. For one, the freedom that equality brings. Too many boys and men are told to hold in their emotion to show strength. While girls and women are ‘allowed’ to show emotion but only because they are ‘weak and helpless’ and they ‘can’t control themselves’. That kind of nonsense is so damaging, I can’t even…
In January, I wrote about teaching children about self-care and mental health, because it’s so important so telling our boys to ‘man up’ like it’s strong to not show emotion apart from anger is frankly, crazy! Let’s allow our men and our little men to be emotionally free. Let’s allow them to be sensitive and to feel. Let’s allow them to practice self-care. It’s not a defect. It’s a natural mental function (Look at suicide rate among males in the UK). To let emotion out, and learning to deal with the cause of the emotion is a strength that we should commend in both males and females. That’s where the idea for the ‘woman up’ tee came from. The strength that a woman has is immense, and shouldn’t be demoted. That ability a woman has to cry, scream, shout, or talk out her feelings, to allow herself to fall and be vulnerable. Then get up again and rise in spite of the struggle she’s been through is just amazing to see. Women are not fragile weak creatures, and that is what I tell both my sons and daughters. Every individual has different strengths that is true. But they are not given out based on gender.
I won’t allow them to think there is only one way to be strong and be a leader. I won’t teach them to accept the double standard that only the male of the species is allowed to hold those traits. You can lead with a bold in your face assertiveness, if that is your style. It doesn’t make you a ‘bitch’ if you’re female. You can also lead with empathy and with a spirit of servitude that doesn’t make you a ‘cissy boy’ if you’re a male. Just NO to that kind of thinking..
Feminism gives ALL the freedom to be who they are. They don’t have to adopt behaviours, which don’t come to them naturally to be acceptable.
They can throw off the personality restraints of what society deems to be feminine and masculine and just. Well. Be.
I belong to the Igbo culture where traditionally the strength of women is well known and both men and women were conscious of the Igbo woman’s rights. I have so many strong Igbo women around me who are not afraid to make their voices heard. Some quietly, some loudly, but one thing is for sure, the women in my family will never run short of assertiveness, it’s considered ‘normal’ in my immediate family. It is quite simply our right as women, as part of the human experience to have a voice and be heard (Thank God for my family!), I have never given it a second thought.
On the flip side, outside of my family, I have seen these rights only afforded to married mothers and to wives. Single women are seen as needing a man before their value can be seen!
How damaging and utterly ridiculous is that? They are not entitled to their say because there isn’t a man by their side, or children at their feet. So she is made to feel inferior. That said, even the label of mother and wife will only get you so far. I have seen with my own eyes a mother be silenced in a matter that pertained to her son, and told, “Shut up. Can’t you see the men are talking?” (Grrrr!) So not cool.
This devaluing of women is happening here in the UK and worldwide in so many places and different cultures to differing degrees, and in different ways. Nowhere is this ok. Women are not inferior at any point of their lives and their voices are capable of producing words of wisdom and knowledge that are no less than the wisdom and knowledge that men provide. This was the inspiration for the ‘I am woman, hear me roar’ t-shirt. It’s time to speak out.
If you’d like to empower your little queens this international women’s day, why not check out our girls t-shirt range.
Till next time.
Peace. I’m out x
